Oh Yeah, We Got Hitched. You Weren’t Invited.

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When the flower arrangements have wilted and your anniversary cake is well on its way to a cryogenic state, it will be time to consider creating and sending out wedding announcements hopefully complete with a few pictures of the mirth-making (gosh, seriously…what do those photographers do all day?).

Imagine receiving pictures from the party of the century to which you weren’t invited that happened last month.  Isn’t that what it’s like to send a wedding announcement to someone who wasn’t invited to the wedding?  Aren’t they outdated?  Basically antiques?  Wouldn’t people receiving them feel obligated to send a gift or money?  Well, not really.  Here are a few announcement DOs to do after you’ve said your “I dos.”

Do accept right now that you cannot invite everyone.  Take an oath, if you must.  Even with weddings now accommodating what seems like any amount between two and two thousand people, you just can’t do it.  Accept it now before it costs you precious time or worse…mascara.

Most people (and we really do mean most) understand that it’s just not possible to invite every acquaintance to a wedding.  That doesn’t mean that just because they weren’t in attendance they don’t want to see what you looked like or how happy you were on your wedding day.  Formal wedding announcements are somewhat of a rarity nowadays.  One that your great Aunt Felicity who isn’t on that Nicebook or Facelook nonsense would be happy to see resurrected.

Do be tactful in your wording.  Let your loved ones know you cared enough to let them know you’re happily betrothed without soliciting for gifts or rubbing in their face that they weren’t there.

It’s a nice gesture to let people know that even though you simply couldn’t accommodate them (wait, you don’t have bottomless pockets?!), you still are thinking about them.  Unless your invitation says “You Weren’t Invited” followed by a Nelson Muntz laugh or “Please Send Money,” it is a very nice way of making distant family and friends feel included in your lives.

Do try and create announcements that tie in with another event or a holiday so it goes over a bit smoother.  Christmas card announcements or “We Just Got Hitched So We’re Moving” announcements are great double-whammy ways to piggy back a wedding announcement on an announcement you’d like to make besides the fact.

If you’re really concerned about how the announcements will be received, you can always shamelessly enlist the help of your parents or in-laws.  The announcements may look a little less “come into my gingerbread house, little children” coming from them and not you and your beloved.  No bread crumbs necessary.

Do realize that in today’s society, people get worried sick about offending someone (something something feelings…).  One would think that if a freshly-made bride has gone out of her way to create, order, pay for and mail formal announcements, it would be considered an act of altruism, not bragging.

While you may think some people will be put off by receiving an announcement to an event they weren’t invited to, the likelihood is very slender.  Plus, if someone’s reaction to a wedding announcement is bitterness, aren’t you even more glad you didn’t invite them to the wedding?  Heck, you may be able to save postage on that one Christmas card this year!  Bah humbug!

So, if sending announcements is important to you, send them.  Those who will be offended would be offended if they didn’t get one.  Just mind your wording, address them correctly and, depending on how many you plan to send, maybe pawn the Kuerig you got as a gift for postage.  And always go with the Elvis stamps.  Always.


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